The past two days have been a bit of a blur. I didn't go into work on Tuesday or Wednesday, in part because I didn't have a ticket (or the money to buy one) to get to work, partly due to generally feeling low and pretty rubbish about things because of my financial s(h)ituation and partly because I woke up with a headache and felt pretty rough. I told work I had a migraine, then promptly got one (this always seems to happen, serves me right I guess).
I had some breakfast and spent the morning in bed, watching Monk and Maury, while playing Honeycomb something-or-other (this online game I occasionally find addictive). I listened to music (Katy Perry is featuring a lot lately, as inspired by my visit to The Mrs), researching the information about debt management plans I had got from the Citizen's Advice Bureau and the Money Saving Expert site (gotta love that Martin Lewis - legend, he should get a knighthood). I tried to find some of my most recent statements (carefully 'filed' somewhere on the pile of papers that is my desk) and make some vague calculations.
Towards lunchtime, my head was really starting to hurt and all the researching and calculating was making me feel more and more sleepy. Deciding to have a little nap, I turned all the electronics off and snuggled down for a quick kip at about 1.30pm. I stirred a few times and it still seemed bright outside, but I was too groggy to fully wake. I woke a while later to find that my clock was displaying 7.05pm. Eh? I sleepily checked my phone before checking the clock again. Yep, definitely 7, as in the evening, as in I had slept the entire afternoon away without having any sense of time passing. I had recollections of when I was feeling at my worst and my low mood made me feel completely drained and frequently wanting to sleep. The money worries of the past week have clearly been getting to me.
I spent the evening in a similar fashion, having a pot noodle for dinner (ahh, just like student times!) that Big Sis had kindly bought me when she popped out earlier in the day. I caught up on some CSI episodes I had missed, tried to finish and post a few blog posts I had half-written and then decided to start something I had been thinking about for a while. I started another blog, one that I could use to post things I find positive, happy, thought-provoking and encouraging. In some of the reading I have done in the past few months about ways to fight depression, one thing I especially remember was the idea of having a box where you keep items that lift your spirits when you're feeling low, as a sort of antidote on bad days. It could be photos of happy times, or cards from people you love, etc. I haven't started one yet, but it's something I want to do at some point, when I'm more organised.
But in the meantime, I had been toying with the idea of a sort of online version. So I started it up on Blogger at: http://blackdogbegone.blogspot.com/ with the title: 'Not Today, Black Dog'. After playing around with the settings and the format, I wondered if Tumblr might be a slightly better-suited platform. I'm more likely to re-blog posts from other people that I like on Tumblr, and this would be easier to do from a blog also hosted on the same site. So I set up the same blog, 'Not Today, Black Dog' at: http://blackdogbegone.tumblr.com/
I'm still deciding whether to keep both, but will most likely be using the Tumblr blog primarily. There is likely to be some overlap between Workinonit and Not Today, Black Dog, but I'm intending the latter to be less explicitly about my own personal experiences and more concise, using a variety of media. I don't have the time, energy or motivation to do two blogs that require such involved writing, in any case. So, now you know. After posting a couple of things, I called it a night and went to bed.
Wednesday, I was still feeling pretty crap and there didn't seem much point in going in feeling like that, seeing as I would only be in for the morning - I had taken the afternoon off for a market research appointment at 3.15pm. I had the appointment for no other reason than the fact they were going to pay me £40 for an hour of my time. My travel problems for the week would be solved.
I had breakfast, had a bath and then spent the rest of the morning 'applying' for my debt management plan. After submitting my income, outgoings and debts, they created a budget for me and assessed how much income I would have left after paying for my living expenses based on this budget. The remaining amount would, if I signed up to the plan, be paid to them (they are a charity) and then split accordingly and used to pay off my debts. They would contact all my creditors in advance to advise them of how much I will be able to pay them each month (I have to contact them myself beforehand to confirm I have given my permission for this and that I have signed up to a debt management plan). Because they are a charity, they do this service for free, which is brilliant. I remain responsible for my debts, but the charity helps me manage them and does the scary bit of talking to the creditors on my behalf. According to their calculations, I should be able to pay everything off in about 6 months. This sticks with my hope to get debt-free this year, so I'm really happy about that and can't wait to get started.
At lunchtime, I got ready, had some noodles while chatting with Big Sis and then left for my appointment. I love going out in the middle of the day, when it's not peak time, I don't have to rush and there aren't so many people around. I put my music on, strolled along from train to tube and got there in good time. The research was on a Blackberry app for mobile banking for one of the banks I use. It is currently being developed and they were testing it out in order to get feedback. It was pretty cool, especially because it's an app I would actually use and want to use. When it's finally released, it will be weird knowing I had a say in its development! Everything was finished in 40 minutes, so while I didn't get any more or less money, my rate had improved to earning £1 a minute, as opposed to the 67p a minute I was worth had it lasted an hour, lol.
I got my cash payment, bought a ticket for the week and then ambled home on a sparsely populated train. I spent the evening watching TV again and pottering around on the internet, dreading work a little bit, but very much less so knowing that I could at least get there and back without any drama. I arrived at work this morning in good time, wrote the letters to all my creditors (that I will send next week once I have been paid and subsequently met my minimum monthly payments) and booked my phone consultation for my CBT. I finished some blogs, in between texting The Mrs, sending a message to Samson and emails back and forth with both Mini-Me and Lolly Lil. Work, you ask? Well yeah, I did that too, but there's so little of it at the moment that I hardly felt bad for using the rest of the time to sort my life out. Things are getting better, slowly but surely. I have decided that 2012 will be my year.
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